April,4,2016 Monday
I was never like the other trash cans.They are all so vivid and colorful,but me, no! I am just a plain old grey with stupid white strips.They all get shiny bottles and cans when I get moldy pizza and hot dogs that fell on the beach. It’s not fair! I got peed on by a dog today. I bet cardboard never gets peed on. Half the people who put trash in me just leave it on the top of my head. I really hate being a trash can. Well, that's all today Diary
Sincerely,Trashy
I really like how you had a lot of character and humour in your story. But I think that you can maybe add a bit more descriptive words into it, and make sure you have a space after your periods. But overall great work!
ReplyDeleteYou have a few punctuation errors throughout your story, but I do really like all of the descriptive language you have used. I also like how your wrote the story like a journal entry or diary!
ReplyDeleteI like your story and I like the emotion in your character. But I didn't under stand when you said "when people put trash in me just leave it on top of my head" because you said put it in and then you said put it on top.
ReplyDeleteI think you are missing a word because you say, "I am just a plain old grey with..." It doesn't make sense to me, you could say, I am just a plain old grey trashcan...
ReplyDeleteGreat story, creative!
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ReplyDeleteCreative story and good, constructive feedback from the commenters.
ReplyDelete