Imagination
I felt the shivers down my spine as I walked down the wooded path lined with trees.As I tripped on a root my lantern almost fell,the flame luckily survived. The cold crisp air blew and the lantern door opened. As the flame flickered and then went out,I fell to the ground in sorrow. I knew I would never make it back to civilization…
“ Sydney,I told you not to play in the woods without my permission!” I looked down at my muddy Converse.
“ Come on,let's get some lunch” My Grandpa said. I nodded.
“Man,you have a wild imagination”.
"Thanks, Grandpa"
Don't forget to put a space after punctuation! Also, when your grandpa comes it gets a bit confusing. How can you look down at your shoes when you're lying on the ground? I think you could say Converse shoes instead of just Converse. Don't forget punctuation when speaking! For example, '“ Come on,let's get some lunch” My Grandpa said.' would be:
ReplyDelete“Come on, let's get some lunch,” my grandpa said.
You might want to add spaces after your periods and commas. But other than that, great story!
ReplyDeleteAre you at night or day because you really wouldn't have a lantern at day. Good story I liked it.
ReplyDelete