Sister show down
My obnoxious 1 year old sister follows me around, I turn around. She wails as my Mom runs over to her.“ What have you done?”My mom yells. I stood there with my jaw hanging.
“ Oh, come on!” I yell
“It's always me!” I stomp away. Brenna , still crying , gets put down for nap. I get an idea. I open the door to my room and creep into Brenna's room and cover her in baby powder and put the bottle beside her.
“ Now she can get in trouble.”
But later that day my Mom screams,
“ Sydney!” Oh jeez, here we go.
I like your plot line! In your last few sentences you should have something at the end of "Now she can get in trouble", and then start off with "But later that day" in the next sentence below.
ReplyDeleteI liked the ending of your story and I liked that you added equal speaking and narrating parts of the story.
ReplyDeleteI like the idea of your story, and the way you used the prompt. But you are missing a period in the second to last line. Overall, great story!
ReplyDeletethe middle of the story is a little jumbled but i think your beginning and ending is funny.
ReplyDelete